By Maybe Lady Liz
They’re starting to roll in. The waves of holiday cards featuring happy families festooned in matching red turtlenecks ‘round the tree or Canadian tuxedos on the beach. There will be some derivation of a toddler with his arms slung around Dad’s neck. Or Mom watching the kids play on a blanket. Or an Ann Geddes-esque shot of a newborn falling asleep on a reindeer’s back, adorned with nothing more than a tiny Santa hat. If you’re lucky, and your friends and family are deft enough with Snapfish, you’ll get ALL THREE in an artistically staggered arrangement.
And if you’re like me, you won’t be able to stop yourself from comparing them to the cards you’ve sent out over the past few years. Maybe you’ve squeezed your cats into little elf outfits and reindeer antlers (and lost an arm in the process). Maybe you’ve posed with your spouse in front of some magnificent European landmark in a subconscious attempt to remind everyone how awesome it is that you have the freedom and cash to travel. Or maybe you’re like me and my husband, who always try to outdo ourselves every year in the clever department. Last year, we put photos of ourselves at age 6, side-by-side, each ripping into hilariously dated gifts, and titled it “Keep Christmas old-school.”
And in years past, when our friends would send just a ho-hum photo with a generic greeting, we were pretty proud of the fact that our card stood out from the pack and had a little personality. We used to tack it up on the half-wall in our kitchen with all the others and pat ourselves on the back. But as the years have gone by, our card has started to stand out for a very different reason. Instead of noticing the unique panache of our card, I’ve started to see what’s missing: a baby, of course. Kids on Santa’s lap, all that jazz.
I try not to let it happen, but I can’t help but look at my cards in a different light – through the eyes of those who are sending out the baby cards. All our attempts at being so clever probably seem silly, frivolous, immature, shallow, self-centered (words that sound familiar to anyone who actually chooses to be Childfree). They must seem like a stage that was supposed to be passed by now, but isn’t. No doubt they somehow seem…less than they’re supposed to be, to them.
I know, I know – it’s probably all in my head and these aren’t very Christmas-y thoughts. But fear not. I’ll keep the funny Childfree holiday cards rolling. Somebody’s gotta Keep Christmas Weird.
Maybe Lady Liz is blogging her way through the decision of whether to create her own Cheerio-encrusted ankle-biters, or remain Childfree. You can follow her through the ups and downs at MaybeBabyMaybeNot.com.
I get what you are saying, as each year my husband and I (and our 2 dogs) try to do the same thing. I think all you can do is embrace the fun card. That is what we are going to do. I would love to see a “whacky childfree holiday card showdown” site. I bet that would rock.
I’m not brave enough to do a photo card for that reason. I make homemade cards and get smug about how I took the time to write a message while they send a photo card with no personal message. It’s the only thing that keeps me from crying. Although, this year, I’ve not gotten any, so maybe my method is working.
Kateanon! I do the same thing! This year I managed to receive all the baby picture cards in good grace without an urge to run them through the shredder. I think this may represent progress.
There is a really great video about our definitions of “family” in Christmas cards. The uterus card (trust me – just watch it) is awesome. Here’s the link: http://harlotofthearts.org/index.php/harlot/article/view/83/73
I do not mail Christmas cards. I stopped about 10 years ago to give our postal workers a break. Instead, I send a professional e-card to all my business contacts and include all my friends and family. So the family/children christmas card dillemna doesn’t hurt me because I choose not to participate in the whole thing.
Those “happy” photo/cards make me cringe every year. I get SO many of them as most of my friends and family have children. In my circle, I am probably the only one in my age group who actually hand-writes cards. Any hand-written cards that I receive are from those over age 60.
I am so lucky that the “photo card” seems to be a US or North American phenomenon. Here in NZ, we get fewer and fewer Christmas cards each year, but they are generally small, and often very beautiful commercial cards, often reflecting the personality of the givers, or the personality of the recipient. This year I have some beautiful Christmassy flower photographs I have taken, and I’m printing some cards individually and sending them off, but also using the commercial cards. Like you I write a note. The photo cards without a message are I think a bit crass. They seem to say “look at us” when really I think the message should be all about the recipient – “this card says we are thinking of you and your life”
I am planning to hang the christmas tree decorations off the pegs of my collection of string instruments, place them on the sofa, take a pic and make that my christmas card. Only thing is I’m a bit late to start the project 🙂
Haha, I did it at the last minute.
A very happy Christmas to everyone!
We send out a card with a picture (or two or three) of our dog. Usually he’s wearing a stupid Christmas hat and looks totally embarassed. Last year, with an early snowfall, we got pictures of him romping in the snow. That’s my answer to all the “my kids are so cute” cards.