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Top 10 Best Things About Not Having Children

March 26, 2010

Every week I’ll be posting a Top Ten list, sometimes based on member polls, sometimes my own Top Ten, and sometimes a Letterman-like silly Top Ten, just for fun.

This week, I’m posting my Top 10 best things about not having children. Please hop over to the forums and add your own.

Top 10 best things about not having children:

10. Being able to fit the weekly groceries into two bags as opposed to two grocery carts.

9. Going to bed at 10:00 p.m. and sleep like the dead until morning, without anyone saying, “Mommy, mommy, mommy, there’s a monster under my bed.”

8. Not being able to name one single character from High School Musical, Cars, or Blue’s Clues.

7. Being able to have sex in my own bed without the risk of having to explain to anyone why daddy is giving mommy a funny massage.

6. Having a purse that contains only a cell phone, wallet and Chapstick—no snacks, wet wipes, scissors, diapers, Band-Aids, action figures, pacifiers, or half chewed candies.

5. Having an urge on Saturday night to go to some experimental theatre in LA and not having to worry about finding a babysitter, or rushing home because of a sudden fever.

4. Two weeks away from my 40th birthday and having only one grey hair.

3. Having a lifelong dream of hiking to Mt. Everest Base Camp and knowing that it still has a chance of coming true

2. Understanding that cheese, olives, and a really good bottle of Sauvignon Blanc is a perfectly acceptable dinner

1. Not having to worry about sending a human being out into the world and worrying if they’ll come back in one piece, or if they’ll grow up to be a serial killer, because genes only go so far. 

What’s your top ten? Tell us.

Filed Under: Lucky Dip

Comments

  1. kathleen guthrie says

    March 30, 2010 at 10:39 am

    These are great! I might add “Never, ever having to change a poopy diaper on an airplane.”

  2. monica says

    June 23, 2012 at 8:48 pm

    Being able to take a nap during the daytime. lol. Having no children is a great life.

  3. Mike says

    February 27, 2014 at 10:45 am

    1. The possibility of early retirement
    2. Less responsibility > I already have more than I want
    3. Less worries
    4. Ease of life
    there are others but those are my big ones.

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