Life Without Baby

filling the silence in the motherhood discussion

Comments

  1. I have a friend that I’ve known since she was born whose pregnancy #3 and #5 (twins!) was an accident.

    IT CAN’T BE AN ACCIDENT IF YOU AREN’T GOING TO USE BIRTH CONTROL. (Yes I know that you can still have surprise pregnancy if you do use birth control. Any one else see the news with the baby born with the mirena held in the newborns hand?!)

    Between baby #1 and baby #2 there were many miscarriages during those 5 years and I really felt bad for her but I mean, come on! 6 kids! Even her sister who had one, and was never able to have another was just flabbergasted by it all. The sister was so much wanting another child that she finally adopted, at 40, a baby.

  2. Oh Lord! As soon as I saw today’s topic, I started giving a round of applaud and shaking my head! YES! where do I even being?! “We weren’t even trying!” “I was at a bar the night before drinking, then found out i was pregnant” “but I was on birth control!” it’s like no matter what people go through, they end up pregnant, someway somehow! and here i am .. years later .. still no baby to talk about.

    Recently, My coworker was telling me how she does not want kids at the moment and wants to go to disneyworld with her husband childfree so see can have freedom to do whatever .. not even a couple of months later i find out she’s pregnant “by accident” .. she even made this raunchy joke that stung like crazy for me, she said something along the lines of “i got naughty for one night and oops here i am, knocked up!” *CRINGE*!!!!!!!! this implies that for one night there was a slip up and you were able to conceive .. sigh .. when will the madness all end

    I wish they didn’t share their stories .. at least around women like us!

  3. My question is: why accidental pregnancies never happened to me?

    How I really felt?… disappointed, frustrated, sad…

  4. To add to my first comment that didn’t post right away .. What makes me cringe even more is when i hear people having BACK to Back accidental pregnancies .. i mean they just had a baby and they get pregnant a month later .. like rlly?!?! how are you going to have 2-3 babies at a time and here i am just wanted and needing 1 !

  5. I feel like I’m surrounded by people with “Accidental” pregnancies or who get pg the second they want to. I just don’t understand how they’re perfectly ovulating the second they have a crazy drunk night or as soon as they decide lets have a kid and it happens immediately. I have a friend who gets pg right away and has no clue about ovulation or anything. I mentioned I get bad ovulation pain and she said to me what’s ovulation.

    • wow, speechless at your friend’s question about what ovulation is! I have a friend who similarly came off BCP and had her baby right away when i discussed , seh also was not aware of her ovulation week etc .. mind boggling

  6. personally don’t beleive in “accidental pregnancies”, Unless a condom tore. Adults know there is a possibility of getting pregnant through unprotected sex. Whether you were trying or not. Its quite annoying to hear this.

    However, I don’t hear much about it. All the friends I had. Got pregnant on purpose and were fortunate. I had one extremely fertile friend. She has 4 babies now . And two of those 4 pregnancies, she told me prior to her getting pregnant. She was single but somehow always found , a different man to get her pregnant. In her first pregnancy she told me: “I’m about to have a baby”, by the next month. She was calling me confirming her pregnancy. She did the same before her 3rd pregnancy. It was extremly painful to witness.

    I mean if a man spits on her she is pregnant. She has a flawless reproductive system. She can have sex with a man once, and is instantly pregnant. I use to wish and pray, that I was her. How could one be so fortunate. I havn’t talked to her in 3 years but heard she just had another one. God!

    I just wonder what does that feel like, to have that kind of power.

    • Damn! seriously that kind of power! I also know a friend who has 4 children, she had to have her tubes tied because she kept getting pregnant .. she also told me the story of her wedding night, how she just new she was pregnant the moment they were intimate .. and low and behold, she had a baby and then 2 and then 3 etc back to back .. sigh here i am years later .. not even one pregnancy :'(

      • Oh. God. I cringe at her “knowing she was pregnant the moment of intimacy. Its crazy how most women have to go out their way. To not get pregnant.

        When others like myself try everything, possible just to ovulate.
        Sometimes I just scream.. “What does it fking feel like” To not have to try. Or to have to prevent it because
        I’m so fertile. They are living to life imo

        I know how you feel about never having a pregnancy.. Uggh. Its beyond crushing and frustrating. I truly question my existence on many days.

  7. One of my friends got pregnant the first time she had sex with her boyfriend, at 28. He pulled out but nonetheless nine months later she had a beautiful healthy baby! I’ve also heard of women getting pregnant while on the pill. Some people seem to be incredibly fertile. Unfair how hard / near impossible it is for others like us!