Over the past couple of years I’ve been “enjoying” a journey into menopause. Yeah, it’s a hoot. All the symptoms of PMS, plus fuzzy head, weight gain, night sweats, the works.
I’ve been prescribed HRT and I’ve been reaching out to older friends for advice, because there’s a lot about this I don’t know. Most of my friends have gladly offered support, however one woman (a friend of a friend) looked at me and said, “Menopause? You’re too young for that.”
I assured her I was not, and left the conversation, but really, is that a helpful thing to say? Yes, I know I’m too young for menopause. Add it to the list of things my body’s given up before its time. And then ask me how I feel about the possibility the rest of me might be aging faster than it should too. Does this ever end?
As you may have guessed, it’s Whiny Wednesday. I feel better for my venting. Hope you feel better for yours.
I so feel for you! I’m in perimenopause and the unpredictability of the flooding periods and mood swings is truly scary! The physical symptoms are a lot to deal with. It is shocking how useless (and clueless) doctors are; they just want to put you on the pill for flooding periods. If anyone has resources (books, websites) to recommend to survive these several years of perimenopause and menopause I’d be most appreciative!
Hello. I’ve just attended a seminar called “Understanding menopause – your qyeations answered”. Led by 2 amazing women. One a severe sufferer ans one a specialist GP.
(Who knew there is more than one type of HRT?)
Resources: http://www.menopausesupport.co.uk It’s run by one of the organisers.
Or Primary Care Women’s Health Forum.
Good luck
Many thanks! And I wish you all the best on this new phase of life 🙂
I’m going to read this very soon: What Your Doctor May Not Tell You About Menopause: The Breakthrough Book on Natural Hormone Balance by John R. Lee, MD.
I loved the book A Strange Period.: Insights Into The Bizarre Experiences Of Perimenopausal Women. I even bought copies for friends.
I, too, am “too young” for this. My body is continuing to betray me at every turn. However, I found primrose oil and black cohosh worked wonders for night sweats, hot flashes, and mood swings. I did my research and found it’s a crapshoot, every body is different, causing every reaction to be different meaning you try everything until something works.
“Does this ever end?” I’m not the one to ask, since I’m 56 going on 57 and STILL not done with Aunt Flo. :p However, my last few cycles have been further & further apart, & I’ve been experiencing more classic symptoms of menopause lately — night sweats, hot flashes, mood swings. It will be a relief to get this phase of my life over with. 🙁
I asked an older female friend was there anything positive about the menopause and she answered “well your periods stop”. Yeah I thought after having experiencing over 250 in my life and still being infertile I’ve been taking a hormone to stop mine for the last two years – I couldn’t bear the monthly reminder that I couldn’t have a baby and still deal all the mess and pain that periods involve and this carry on until my menopause! Can anyone say anything positive about this time in life?
Say something positive about menopause…. Now, that’s a tough one! I was put through medical menopause after my endometriosis surgery. It was awful, and I say that no one should have to preview that! I’m quite certain I will go through early menopause, as well. This month has been difficult as my endometriosis symptoms are flaring up and I’m in pain again. Also, my mood swings, crying over everything & nothing, and being tired… Well, it’s all getting old. I’m sorry that you ladies (well, and me) are having to go through this. It stinks! But I do feel a bit better having complained for a moment!
I’m 50 and I still have my periods. They are short- 3 days, but the first day the flow is ridiculously heavy. I don’t have any menopausal symptoms other than that. My doctor thought I was starting it in August of last year when my VERY regular period was 2.5 weeks late. A pregnancy test was negative. (Even then I was hoping.) Period has been regular just like before since then. I dread the menopause. Because even though it’s been “over” for me for years, when that happens, then I’ll KNOW that it’s over…much love ladies…
Oh yes, the ‘You’re too young’ comment.
I’ve been suffering from hormonal disorders since puberty. I would refer to my endocrinological system as unassembled IKEA furniture: all the parts are there but it’s impossible to put together. It took years for doctors to even entertain the idea that I wouldn’t just ‘age out’ of my issues and eventually have a baby. Now that I’m in my mid-thirties I hear “Well if you would have started treatments years ago’ and I just want to punch people in the throat. I’ve been experiencing pre-menopause, peri-menopause and early onset menopause since my twenties. It’s already been over ten years of this bullpoop. I feel cheated, and I feel let down by my body. I’m sick to death of hearing ‘You’re too young’ as a response to everything I’m going through. I really feel like saying “Well you’re too old to be such a dingbat, but here you are”, but then I’m no better than they are.
The best part about ‘You’re young’ is that it was also the go to response when we first struggled with our infertility. We were in our mid-twenties, and despite taking years to become pregnant, only to miscarry, ‘You’re still young’ was somehow supposed to be a consolation. Miscarriage after miscarriage, year after year we heard it until recently, now I hear “You’re running out of time” just as much as I hear ‘You’re too young’ in regards to having a baby when the reality is simply ‘You’re not having a child’.
The only thing that is positive about having hormonal issues so young, is that I am the master at cooling down in summer from all the hot flashes I’ve had to deal with over the years.
That’s my rant this Wednesday, thinking of all you ladies out there. Hugs.
I am so sorry that you have had to go through all of this. Hugs.
I am also too young for menopause. I had my last period at 43 and the symptoms of perimenopause were with me for years before that. It was a really tough time and I was so angry at my body for robbing me of any last chance to have a baby after 2 miscarriages. Doctors told me I was too young but we know our bodies best and the changes started for me when I was 36. I am approaching 48 soon and I am more accepting of the situation now. I certainly don’t miss my period and I am very thankful that the hot flashes only occur occasionally. Good luck to my fellow LWB ladies navigating this journey- it is a challenging ride!
my periods went away pretty quietly… they were never, ever right – too heavy, massively irregular (months without, a couple weeks between or once I had one lasting over two months, even! never predictable, always messy.) I was terribly anemic for a while, and my drs tried to blame my periods, but that was the time when every period was lighter than the last until they were gone entirely. (I actually felt way better back when my periods were super heavy!) I figured my body just couldn’t make blood anymore, ANY blood, and I was too tired to fight for better medical care. Also went thru the, “oh, you should have had this seen to YEARS ago.” I f***ing ASKED years ago, FOR years.Y’all didn’t care, drs! And I *still* have the occasional period, every 13 or 14 months or so. So I’m officially “menopausal” (no period in a 12 mo. stretch) but maybe not fully in menopause – but! now I get to go for the fun invasive is-it-cancer tests every time I get a period. yay. I’m happy not to have to deal with the blood and the mess and the cost of the pads any more, but dang. I feel f***ed over by my drs and forgotten and ignored by Mother Nature. At least Mother Nature never pretended to care, eh.
sigh.
I couldn’t take the pain any more and Aunt Flo going on vacation with me in April with the most excruciating pain was the last straw and I went on the pill to stop my period. I’m not even 40 yet and my body has always been like clockwork; period every 35-40 days (until the pill).
If I follow my mom then I have about another 10-13 years before menopause starts. My mom only ever had about a half dozen hot flashes. She had what she called cold flashes. She would get so cold she would have a jacket on in the middle of July in a southern US summer. 90*F+ and she would have a jacket on! Not looking forward to that. I hate being cold.
I went into premature ovarian failure aka early menopause probably around 37-38 years old. I officially got diagnosed a couple years ago. Basically my periods became erratic until there were none at all. That was it. They took a bunch of blood tests to check hormone levels and made it official. I’ve had no menopausal symptoms at all except no more period. So me putting off having kids or deciding to have kids made me lose my chance I guess. My body made the decision for me. I’m trying not to be bitter and angry about it. I really hate when people say it must be nice not gonna be a period anymore. And I guess it is but there are consequences to that too. So much for that.