Life Without Baby

filling the silence in the motherhood discussion

My First Drive-Through Nativity

Tootling around town this weekend, J and I saw a banner for a drive-through nativity. We couldn’t resist!

Is there anything more American than the drive-through concept? I drive through to get coffee, medicine, even dry-cleaning! I arrived in the U.S. too late to catch a drive-through movie, but I felt compelled to take advantage of the drive-through nativity.

It was lovely. There were ten or so scenes telling the story of Jesus, all the way from the Angel Gabriel to the rolling away of the stone. Each scene was narrated via a loaned in-car CD (or cassette in our old car) and featured live actors and an assortment of stuffed animals and baby dolls. There were wise men in tennis shoes and pint-sized shepherds with itchy headgear. So far, it was the most Christmas-y thing we’ve done yet this year.

What does this have to do with being childless? Absolutely nothing. But my life isn’t only about my lack of motherhood; it’s also about spending time with friends (at a fun dinner party), eating fabulous dinners out (best Italian food I know of), seeing bad movies (The Tourist. Skip it!), and celebrating the holidays with a drive-through nativity.  What else is your life about right now?

Hello, My Name is….

I always try to make the posts on this blog relevant to the main topic of life without baby, but some days I’m just blank. Wednesday was one of those blank days, so I wrote about natural treatments for insect bites instead. I thought twice about even posting such a random thing, but guess what? It was the most popular post of the week!! At first I was dismayed, but after some thought I realized something important: we don’t always want to talk about not having children.

For those of us who are childless-not-by-choice, the constant conversation can wear on us, but for all of us, being childless is not what defines us. Imagine walking into a party, striding up to a stranger and saying. “Hi, my name is [your name] and I don’t have children.” Although some might see it as a great pick-up line, most people would say something like, “oh, that’s nice,” and excuse themselves as quickly as possible, because if that’s all someone has to say about themselves, odds are they’re not going to very interesting.

Not having children is not all we are, so I thought it might be fun to introduce ourselves, with some interesting tidbits–break the ice, so to speak. I’ll start and you can jump in with your own personal trivia. I’ll also open up a Discussion thread on the forums in case you don’t feel like introducing yourself out in public. So here goes:

Hi, my name is Lisa and I’m a writer, runner, and gardener. I can recite the alphabet backwards and was once my county orienteering champion, which means I’m a handy with a map and compass. I love to experiment with cooking, especially spicy ethnic food, such as Indian, Middle Eastern, and Southeast Asian. I love to travel, and my favorite U.S. cities are New York, New Orleans, and Seattle. The most amazing things I’ve ever seen are Machu Picchu at sunrise, the Trevi Fountain in Rome, and a herd of elephants walking 20 feet from my car in South Africa. I love to dance, but am not good at it, and I’m learning to play the bagpipes–and I’m really not good at that. I love my cat, I couldn’t have mail ordered a better mother than the one I have, and my husband can make me laugh until I snort. If I could have any food from anywhere in the world right now, I’d have a freshly baked New York bagel—everything with cream cheese and lox. If I could be anywhere in the world right now, I’d be hiking down from a mountain in the English Lake District, just about to take off my hiking boots and dip my feet in a cool stream. I don’t own a TV, a microwave, or a dishwasher. And yes, I have no children either.