Our private community now boasts close to 3,000 members and I’m extremely proud of the support and camaraderie we offer one another.
Periodically, someone leaves and I wish her a silent farewell and good luck. Members don’t often fill in the note about why they’re leaving, but when they do, it’s usually along the lines of “Yippee! I’m pregnant. See you later, sucka!”
Ok, it’s never like that, but you get the idea. Women generally leave Life Without Baby to pursue life with baby, and I have to admit that it always stings a little.
Recently, though, one member left and gave this wonderful reason:
“I am moving on from my identity as a childless woman.”
I wanted to throw her a party. She’s not leaving because she’s no longer a childless woman; she’s leaving because she no longer wants to carry around that label and all the stigma and resentment that can come along with it. She’s moving on, I assume, to embrace her life as a woman, with all its facets.
We play many roles in our lives and carry an assortment of identities. Sometimes those identities no longer suit us and we have to let them go. And while I’m sorry to lose a member, I truly wish her nothing but a wonderful life.
I pray and wish some day I could reach acceptance!
I stay for encouragement and to let others know you can live a life as a childless woman and be proud of it. I dont mind that being my identity because that is who I am…or a part of who I am
I have survived and I am proud of it
I have lost and I have loved.
I am a childless Widow but I am happy to be alive and healthy and travel to regions I have never been to before.
I hope and pray others in this group can also get to this point…it doesnt happen overnight but it can still happen
That is awesome, Lenita! You sound like one strong lady!
I’m so glad you shared this, Lisa! I think it’s pretty amazing that the former member is able to move on beyond childlessness.
Like Lenita, I enjoy remaining a part of the childless tribe to show others that you truly can find joy in a childless life, in Plan B, in the what is…
But what I love most is that we can each tell our version of our story… Some need to move on and away; others choose to move on, but stay… Each and every one of us is amazing, however!
I agree with Lenita. I stay to support those still on the journey. I’ve mostly accepted my situation. There will always be certain things in life that bring up the familiar pang and sting of not having my own child, but I’ve processed so much through my 25+ years of infertility, and it’s an honor to assist anyone I can along this lonely journey.
One can be part of many tribes. This is one of mine – and thank goodness for it!
3000 members — wow! That’s pretty amazing, Lisa! 🙂