Tonight is Bonfire Night in the U.K. As a child, it was one of my favorite nights of the year, second only to Christmas Eve.
We’d have a bonfire in the backyard, and my dad would bring home a box of fireworks to set off and a couple of packets of sparklers. We’d have baked potatoes and roast chestnuts, and my mum would make parkin and gooey, delicious bonfire toffee. It was an evening spent outdoors, clustered around the fire. It was about friends and food and a little bit of danger.
It’s one of the many things I miss about my homeland, and it’s one of the traditions I would have enjoyed sharing with my children. And that’s the topic for this week’s Whiny Wednesday:
Traditions you won’t get to share with your children
Happy Bonfire Night and happy whining.
I think about this a lot. I was born and lived in Ireland until I Was 11. Then my parents moved my 4 brothers and I to the USA. I always wanted to make sure my children were aware of their Irish and English heritage (my Mum was Irish and Dad was English). Now both my parents are dead and it makes seem even more empty. I wanted an Irish name, comfy foods like Shepherd’s pie and Irish stew. My youngest brother has 4 children but he lives in England and another brother has 1 daughter who I don’t see much of. I went to a party for Halloween so dressed up and made a great costume. I thought- “God, my kids would have had great Halloween costumes.”
I finally let go of having children this past year. I delved into the world of Donor conception but realized it wasn’t for me (my husband died 8 1/2 years ago. I am 44).
I ended a relationship with a man who I really cared about due to circumstances I wasn’t willing to compromise on. He had 2 children so I got to experience a little of that life. It’s been hard but I do feel a tiny (very tiny) bit stronger for it all. As Thanksgiving and Christmas are already being shoved down out throats in the US, I am bracing myself. I signed up to work a lot of days as I work in healthcare and everyone wants time off. To get a tree or not. Not sure what I’ll do.
My family is made up of storytellers. Everytime we gather, we share the same stories and add one or two more. Even my niece, who never met my great-grandmother, has a favourite “Nana” story. This is how we keep the memory of our family alive. Now I’m going to go and have a good cry.
Your story made me teary, hope you felt better after your cry – sometimes it can be very cleansing. x
Growing up I loved this homemade Advent calendar. It is a felt Christmas tree with ornaments tucked into pockets. As a child I loved pulling the ornament out and putting it on the tree. My mom gave it to me a couple of years ago. When we moved into our first house 3 years ago, I starting hanging it up for Christmas. My husband and I take turns putting the ornaments on the tree. I do it even though it makes me sad. Actually, a lot about Christmas makes me sad.
My mother died a month ago and clearing her apartment, I found a box full of baby clothes, that my younger brother and I wrote when we were babies.
Our mother made them and she kept them all these years. My brother has two daughters, but they are too big for these clothes.
I don’t want to throw them away, but they weigh me down if I bring them home.
I already have a big box full of toys in a storage.
Can’t throw them away either, but what am I to do with them, the old clothes and toys?
Hi Lin, I’m so sorry for your loss – even though you don’t know me – I am sending you some virtual love and hope you are doing ok at this difficult time. If you are unsure of what to do with the clothes and toys can you try and make room for them in storage somewhere until you are, I think at this fragile time you don’t need to make a decision right now. xx
My Christmas tree – I love it, and I’ve collected ornaments from all over the world. It will never mean much to any of my nieces or their children. Sigh.
I also would have loved to have shared certain Thai traditions (their New Year, for example) with my children.
It was Guy Fawkes’ here last night – we sat and looked at the valley below us, filled with sky rockets and explosions and sparklers being waved by children in houses all around us. I didn’t really think about what we might have been doing if we’d had kids. Till now. Thanks a lot Lisa. (Just kidding!)
I know what you mean about special collectible ornaments. Lately I have thought about what will become of them. None of it would mean much to my nieces and nephews either. I also have a baby sweater that my grandmother knitted many years ago and gave to me for “someday”. She is long gone, but I saved that sweater because she made it, but it makes me sad whenever I come across it tucked away in that drawer.
I went to grad school in the UK… I miss this, too! 🙂
Here (Switzerland), Saint Nicolas (a more “historical” Santa Clause) comes to families’ homes. There, he reads from a biiiig book – all the things the children did well over the last year, and the things they didn’t, and he chides them a bit. The children then get to say a little poem or sing a song and then they get some sweets and gifts. Sometimes Santa doesn’t come to the homes but the families go to the forest to “look for him” and meet him there. This year I got invited both by the family of my godchild and another friends’ family to go along to “find Santa” 🙂 – I even had to decide which one I would go visit on that day!
Elf on a Shelf seems like lots of fun. I’d make time to arrange that stupid little guy in all sort of crazy situations in order to thrill children.
Last Easter a sister in law asked us to hide eggs for the Easter Bunny. I did it and sort of enjoyed it. Made me say though too.
On Mothers Day everyone wishes me a “happy mothers day” because I am in fact a Godmother to several children. I know they say it to be nice and it comes from very good intentions. They want me to know that even though I’m not a mother I’m a mother figure. But it’s a pity thing. I really, really hate it. One year a family friend came to the gathering with flowers for the mothers. He insisted I take one home as well. I threw it away.
Even stupid holidays like Valentines Day – I’d want to tint the milk pink. Or leave a little note in a lunch box. St. Paddy’s day would of course mean green milk. Snow days would result in cozy movies afternoons, crafting and cookie making. Super hots days would be spent cooling off at that local swimming pool, then an air conditioned visit to the library, followed by a trip to the ice cream shop, and an early bedtime.