This Saturday is Halloween, which for many of us means streams of cute children knocking on our front doors.
Love it or hate it; it’s hard to avoid it. So the discussion topic for this week is:
How do you handle this difficult holiday?
As it’s Whiny Wednesday, there’s room for your gripes here, too.
Hi Ladies,
Last year, my husband and I decided to get away from the house and we did a “dinner and a movie”. It was WONDERFUL. We had the best time! The restaurant was empty and so was the movie theater. Instead of feeling sad I somehow joked and said “Oh honey, you rented out the restaurant for me – Oh, i private dinner just for us!” Last year we toasted to doing this new tradition each and every year. It’s what “we – a family of two” do. My husband just sent me the reservation confirmation for Saturday and I’m really looking forward to the night (which hasn’t happened in many years!). I do think having plans has helped me handle the holiday so far.
This is what we’re going to do this year. I cannot wait. 🙂
I love to play dress-up, so I’ll spend maybe an hour or so in my Adult Wednesday Addams costume giving out some candy, then I’ll get out of Dodge for a grownups-only Halloween house party with friends.
I love Halloween, though it’s not my favorite day of the year to not have children. I somehow manage to put a smile on my face and answer the door. Fortunately I live on a street that doesn’t have too many small children so it’s not overwhelming. If so, I would probably go out for the day too!
I live in a building with no children, no trick-or-treaters to worry about.
I am actually planning to go trick or treating with my friend who has two kids (4 yrs & 1 yrs). I went last year & helped the (then) 3 yr old up and down the steps and I had a great time! I did it as an immersion-therapy-lite sort of thing; I don’t see this friend often & when I do I spend a couple days at her house. there are zero children in my life, let’s see if I can handle a little dose, since small doses of my friends children are the ONLY children I will ever have in my life… And I don’t want to never have any children in my life, nor do I want to loose my friends because they have children. So, little visits, usually accompanied by a fun activity (such as Halloween, or an annual model train show I hope continues as an annual event for another friend, her 4 yr old & I…) seems to work for me – these friends all already have so much I envy; houses! jobs that pay well! wealthy extended family! security! that children are just one more thing I envy. I pop in, do a brief spot of vicarious living, and then pop back to my barren poverty… (and I have a therapist helping me be “okay” with my barren poverty.) Yes, I envy my friends! Yes, sometimes it really, really hurts to see everything I want laid out before me, given to other people… but I will not let the hurt suppress the happiness that I have for my friends and their successes. And, they invite me over because they only see me once a year anyway (all live out of town) and they think I am fun and awesome and want their kids to meet me! That part feels pretty good…
So, not so whiny! But I probably am glad I don’t have to answer my own door to loads of adorable babies, where I would start fantasizing about how adorable my OWN would be if I got to dress one up myself… sigh. I keep myself busy assisting my friend, bizarrely, less time to think about it!
I don’t like to go out on Halloween because the kids are always running in the street. We usually give out candy. This year, we plan to keep our light off and watch scary movies all night. We used to dress our pets up in costume so the kids would see them and laugh when I opened the door to hand out candy. The past few years, we have not had any children and we decided to keep the light off otherwise we will end up eating the candy.
Halloween was probably one of the worst holidays for me, when we were in the throws of infertility. Seeing those cute kids in their costumes, and there parents taking them out to trick or treat was very painful. My husband and I have done both, gave out treTs, not given out treats and gone to dinner and a movie. I am not sure what this year will bring. We moved recently and are in a new neighborhood which is really nice. I guess as of today, I feel ok about it. We actually got a pumpkin, and a few decorations which is different for us. But whether I give out candy or not I have learned is Ok. Being I. Thi life without baby club, at times makes me feel like I’m in the. Minority. So really what matters the most is doing what is best for me and my husband. Give candy don’t give candy, it really is up to us. I don’t feel as sad about being a club member today, that could change 1 hours from now 1 day from now. But it’s nice not to have to hate Halloween like in the early days.
We have either gone out or kept the light off and not answered the door. One year my husband answered by mistake because we forgot about it! We had nothing to give – he handed out apples and we laughed so much afterwards at their crest fallen faces. We have never had any callers since – funny the year after the apples we thought we would try and get involved so we bought sweets especially and no-one came. We then moved and everyone in the street is older or there is an established “no pumpkin and candles” and you don’t get disturbed (just in case you are old and don’t want to answer). Its definitely been a difficult time over the years and I don’t feel bad now that we did what we needed to do. This year, we will be watching strictly come dancing in the UK and will not have any candles down the path so there will be no callers – if I see a few families go by out the window all dressed up – I’ll be sad for me and my husband but will distract myself with the Jive lessons we are going to take next year!! If you can somehow – check out Jay McGuiness from the Wanted and Aliona – they did the best Jive I have ever seen.
Past years have been difficult last night was odd. We went with my niece trick or treating and my in laws. My niece had her friend and the moms helped them to the doors, my husband hung back with the guys and the tractor. I felt a little lost. I didn’t feel sad though. But no matter how I felt it was okay