A while ago Kath sent me this article about Dolly Parton and her views on childlessness and other people’s children. She talks about how she’s made room in her life for her nieces and nephews, how their children came to call her “Aunty Granny”, and how she’s now “Gee-Gee” (for great-granny.)
“I often think, it just wasn’t meant for me to have kids,” she says, “so everybody’s kids can be mine.”
I love her for that attitude.
So, why did this lovely article warrant a Whiny Wednesday spot?
Because in the sidebar of People magazine, in a section titled, “You May Like…” where I’d expect to find articles about other cheroes (heroes who happen to be child-free) like Miss Dolly, instead I’m offered stories about the ever-expanding Duggar clan and even more “things you didn’t know” about celebrities and their offspring.*
Even when we do get to hear about someone without children, there’s no escaping the fact that, ultimately, families rule.
It’s Whiny Wednesday. What’s under your skin this week?
*Note: when I checked this week, there were new non-kid articles, so it may be safe to go and read the Dolly piece.
Everytime I’m in the checkout aisle, I am flooding with pics of celebrities on the cover of magazines either holding babies or pregnant with a big belly .. or the words “PREGNANT” “BABY” are bold in my face .. it’s like life is mocking me .. sigh
I believe I am “hopefully” going towards acceptance of my life without babies.
To consider other people’s children as my own… I am not there yet. I am being honest with my words.
Praying and blessing for all of us !
Seems like there is no getaway from pregnancy and babies. There was all the news over the pregnant giraffe and then everyone is sharing the pg mom who decided to get her 15 minutes of fame wearing a giraffe head. Sometimes it’d be nice to read a magazine or go on facebook without talk of pregnancy and babies.
I am so annoyed with the celebrity baby fuss. It not just celebrities its anyone with a TV Show. I cannot watch TV without the remote control in hands, or inches away. I find myself constantly hitting the pause button, volume or Changing the channel. It’s like I can’t even enjoy TV anymore. Lifetime use to be one of my favorite TV channels easy. But with all of it movies tied around pregnancy and shows like “little Women”. Really just have push me far away from the channel. I admit I have watched a few of the baby topic movies. When they have a great storyline. One commercial of the show a” little women” say another one other.. “You are just mad because you don’t have a baby daddy”. I’m like are you serious this is the stuff, they broadcasting to kids. That its okay to just have a man baby and he is not in your life, but you have his baby so you are above someone? SMH That is just sad and desperate. Why is everything so backwards nowadays. I have never tuned in to those shows, but so annoyed with the advertising of them. There is my whine/Rant
Families rule, and they even rule within your own extended family.
It seems like if you’re not adding branches to that big old family tree you are useless, an anecdote to be brought up during the real adult conversations. I sit in a room full of people who I once felt so bonded too, and now I feel so isolated and alone. It’s like I’m rejected for not following the natural order of things, I’m a square peg in a round hole and no one knows what to do with me.
Now that the younger generations are having children, I’m even more alone in the sea of parents that makes up my extended family. They don’t even ask what is going on in our lives anymore, and if I dare tell them or speak up to try and join in on a conversation some snappy comment is made to remind me that no one else has time to be so ridiculous as to watch a movie not made by Pixar or Disney. They ask me instead how my friends with children are doing, and about their kids as I don’t have my own to talk about.
On some days I look at the women in my family and I feel very sorry for them, unable to carry a conversation about anything other than children and babies. From the younger ones to the elders, it’s all anyone ever talks about: their children, their grandchildren, what’s going on with so-and-so’s children, who’s children became this or that.
I don’t know if it’s jealousy that I can’t join in or relief that I will never fit in with them that I’m feeling.
This week, there was another one pregnancy announcement here in my workplace, the one was two weeks ago. I’ve been working here for almost ten years, same years I’ve been married, and each time there’s one pregnant employee, I am always that one who gets to be asked when’s my turn. This one I just ignored like I did not hear her and do what I was doing. I know it’s kind of rude, but I did not regret ignoring them.
I feel definitely families rule . Now I have friends that are grandmas.that adds a new wrinkle for me.most of the time I can say the appropriate thing. But when that is all they talk about.theni need to say tactfullycan we talk about something else.i sometimes feel that
To make plans with our friends with kids. The expectation is that we need to change our schedule because we don’t have kids.someyimws it’s my baggage about this too.someday I’m great with it. Other times a bit sad. But overall I am accepting I will notbea mom.i had an grandma like women who did not have kids I asked her about it. She said if I had kids I couldn’t spend time with you. It wS a healthy thought. Thanks for the topic .
i love that mindset dolly has.its cool. Be Childfree dies allow more freedom for me and my husband.i had a favorite grandma like and she was childless when I asked her she said if O had kids I could not go on trips with you kids.its been more challenging with my girlfriends becoming grandmas. It feelslike 2 punches in the stomach at times.. I have accepted we will notbeparents,but At times Isti have feelings about this.but I do have a choice how long I entertain them. I try to be grateful for what I do have. ❤. Much love to my fellow travelers on this journey.
Help. My second work colleague has just announced shes 6 weeks pregnant. The other one just left work heavily pregnant and i could finally breathe a sigh of relief. Not one week later the woman who I practically share a desk with beams tgat shes 6 weeks along.
Please help me. This seems surreal and impossibly cruel.